Helpful ReplyHot!Before someone you loves dies

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Lrrr
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Re: Before someone you loves dies 2017/06/30 21:28:00 (permalink)
Sorry for your loss JD, 25 is no age at all.
 
Like Razor said, T-Kay-O was a bit of a watershed moment and Hatchet to a lesser extend. Even though he OD'd, made you realise that most people who act up in a crazy way on here usually have deep rooted issues.

#91
Geordie007
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Re: Before someone you loves dies 2017/06/30 21:50:57 (permalink)
Didn't hunchback who made the mttpm thread also top himself?

Imo men's mental health has never got the exposure and support it should and I can see the tide is turning on that but for some it's too late and whilst that makes me sad especially to see the loss that JD had then fuck it message someone.
#92
Lrrr
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Re: Before someone you loves dies 2017/06/30 22:00:27 (permalink)
I know it's not exactly saying much as you can't judge a person through a forum, but I'd never have had you down as someone suffering from mental health issues.
 
I've had a few bad times, but they've all been self-inflicted rather than a genuine mental health issue. Glad to hear you've got things under control now!

#93
beat freak
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Re: Before someone you loves dies 2017/07/01 07:10:28 (permalink)
Been through a few episodes over the years, dipped in and out of meds, some worked some didn't. To echo a lot of words on here,  talking is the best way. Once I finally accepted that I was depressed and that I couldn't get through it on my own anymore and opened up about it, half the battle was won. It was astonishing how much better I felt in that small moment of acceptance.
 
Now I know when I feel the cloud and fog coming I can just lean on a couple of my closest friends, let it out, let the darkness pass and know that I'll be alright soon enough.
 
Easier said than done to open up to people and accept all is not well, but I haven't touched meds for five years despite feeling terrible at times and that's down to being open and being lucky enough to have the tightest of friends.
#94
JAWA
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Re: Before someone you loves dies 2017/07/01 08:48:40 (permalink)
geordie007
Didn't hunchback who made the mttpm thread also top himself?


Yes
#95
Spartacus Mills
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Re: Before someone you loves dies 2017/07/01 13:01:08 (permalink)
gutlessrhyme
Do you think we can draw any parallels between regular usage of class A (and prescription) drugs over the years and the fragile mental state of some people? 
I know from personal experience I was  much more up and down mentally when I was hitting the drugs regularly. Now I've hit the pipe and slippers I've been on a level for years. 




Difficult to say from my personal perspective. I was diagnosed with Type II Bipolar Disorder almost 2 years ago to the day and from what I gather, destructive behaviour and a penchant for booze and class As is a common trait of the disorder.
 
What I'm less clear on is if I was attracted to drugs and alcohol as a coping mechanism or whether it was the catalyst for it.
 
I was reluctant to go the prescription drug route because of the ugly stigma associated with mental health but without them and the diagnosis I'd be dead now for sure.
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Geordie007
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Re: Before someone you loves dies 2017/07/01 13:09:38 (permalink)
Gifmaster Flex
gutlessrhyme
Do you think we can draw any parallels between regular usage of class A (and prescription) drugs over the years and the fragile mental state of some people? 
I know from personal experience I was  much more up and down mentally when I was hitting the drugs regularly. Now I've hit the pipe and slippers I've been on a level for years. 




Difficult to say from my personal perspective. I was diagnosed with Type II Bipolar Disorder almost 2 years ago to the day and from what I gather, destructive behaviour and a penchant for booze and class As is a common trait of the disorder.
 
What I'm less clear on is if I was attracted to drugs and alcohol as a coping mechanism or whether it was the catalyst for it.
 
I was reluctant to go the prescription drug route because of the ugly stigma associated with mental health but without them and the diagnosis I'd be dead now for sure.


Fuck I may have to get myself tested for that then too.

Was only recently that I've discovered one or two of my friends were on Meds too for their depression so it really has taken away the stigma for me now I k ow I'm not alone.
#97
Spartacus Mills
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Re: Before someone you loves dies 2017/07/01 13:15:08 (permalink)
You said you ended up in hospital, right? Do you mind if I ask how many episodes you experienced like that in a year?
 
If you were generally ok most of the time but the episodes were infrequent yet ultra severe, you might wanna look at Type 1
#98
Geordie007
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Re: Before someone you loves dies 2017/07/01 13:38:05 (permalink)
That was the first one that was like that to be honest but now I'm looking back over my life and stuff theres been plenty times where I've gone off the rails to a certain extent.

Even the other month when I had a massive wobble I didn't go back to see the shrink I just came home and cried for an hour or two thinking about what a cock I was
#99
Jonesy.
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Re: Before someone you loves dies 2017/07/01 20:11:34 (permalink) ☄ Helpfulby Stamina MC 2017/07/02 01:04:09
This must be the deepest thread I've ever read on here.

Salute DNBA. When it comes to real sensitive issues this forum can be amazing.

DJ_MEDIC
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Re: Before someone you loves dies 2017/07/02 23:50:40 (permalink) ☄ Helpfulby Ascension 2017/07/03 07:58:34
JAWA
geordie007
Didn't hunchback who made the mttpm thread also top himself?


Yes



Oh no Hunchback too  RIP
 
I'm pleased to read this thread and must big up all the support on DNBA, a refreshing change.  Most of us here share a lot of similarities and as much as forums can easily invite bullying, DNBA can feel really quite family like and more so in recent years.  Long may this continue and hope some goodness can prevail.
MellowHype
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Re: Before someone you loves dies 2017/07/03 06:34:11 (permalink)
Sorry for your loss JD. I did see something on Facebook about it. And thought that that is what might of happened.
JUDGEDREDD
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Re: Before someone you loves dies 2017/07/03 06:52:07 (permalink)
Cheers mate and thanks for all the kind words on here everyone, drum & sympathy arena x
Bruce Bogtrotter
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Re: Before someone you loves dies 2017/07/03 07:09:46 (permalink)
Law
Shouts and love going to people going through a bad time. I've seen it happen first hand and although I don't know what it feels like, I know what it can do to people. 

 
This 100%. I'd say I have a handful of friends that suffer with mental health issues with a couple on the higher end of the scale... Sometimes, someone just being around for a normal chat/drink helps bring them down from a bad place. It's such a shit condition!


SmokedEggs
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Re: Before someone you loves dies 2017/07/03 11:04:45 (permalink)
Rudiger01
Arcadian
yeah small steps, about 10 months ago a good day for me was if I could get out of bed without having a panic attack. just getting through a day was hell
 
things get better when youre honest and open up about what youre going through.
 
mental health stats suggest women are twice as likely to suffer from depression yet men are four times more likely to kill themselves.
it shows that women seek help while men suffer in silence. theres good work going in to getting rid of the stigma people have about being a burden etc
 
 
 




I would never discuss any of my issues with anyone. I deal with all of my issues in the same way. Cocaine and Rum
 
Edit - thats not an OI OI ROONEH BANTZ type post. Its a genuine fact. I would feel so awkward talking to my mates or family about anything going on in my head




talk to someone else then... a counsellor for example
Joey Gunz
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Re: Before someone you loves dies 2017/07/03 11:21:48 (permalink)
I've had depression, I probably will always have it, not always depressed though, try and be as open as I can be about it but still a lot of people don't believe you. Thoughts and support to all of you dealing with it one way or another, with yourself or others.
 
Lost a friend earlier this year, last time I saw here down the Black and she mentioned that she'd been suffering from Anxiety and Depression and we talked but when I found out she'd ended her life I felt like I should have done more with the information I had.
 
Anyway here's a little something on her;
 
She was 27/
 
Today we say goodbye to a beautiful soul. The girl that had that contagious energy you'd struggle to keep up with, an infectious laugh that could stay with you a lifetime; with wit and humour beyond her years - she was the kinda girl everyone needed in their lives because her presence made you feel so good. She was real, honest, beautiful and a million other things all rolled into one. From an outsider looking in, she had it all together with a wonderful family, precious friends, a beautiful home. So it breaks my heart to know how deeply she suffered with her mental health. Thanks to Facebook's algorithms I never saw her sharing our posts on mental health ... had I seen this, I would have reached out. When we see the people sharing our posts, 9/10 times when we have reached out - there has been openness, thanks and relief to speak on the receiving end - and sometimes this can make all the difference. I'm utterly devastated I did not reach out to Grace and I urge all of you to speak with those you love, distant friends, relatives and colleagues - check in with them - if you notice anything that makes you think 'they could be struggling' - take the chance, embrace the awkwardness, see how they are doing! Connect! Sometimes the struggle is too much to bare, and I'm sure we can all relate to this in our own ways ... Sometimes life hurts too much ... And sometimes, mental illness takes lives.
 
This post is dedicated to the life of Grace Dear, and our thoughts, prayers and strength goes out to the Dear Family on this difficult day ❤️🙏
 
In one final note, we are reminded, more than ever that the work we do for #MentalMovement is necessary. It pains us to know we can't 'save' everyone, but assures us that if we work hard enough, we can fight against a system that continually fails us, a stigma that continually silences us and a pain that continually tries to hold us down.
 
The fight continues, for you, for us and for everyone struggling with their mental health. You are not alone in this! Turn your struggles into power, take your pain and transcend it into something beautiful and live a life you are worthy of living.
 
Please share this with your friends and family and let those suffering in silence know that it's OK not to be OK and that they are not alone in their suffering. 🙏
 
If you are struggling with your mental health, please seek professional advice immediately. Book an appointment with your Doctor. If you are experiencing suicidal thoughts please dial 999 immediately. There is help for you! We have an international help section on the website under "I Need Help" where you can find worldwide support lines, charities and mental health organisations. But please, talk about it. The moment you open up about your own mental health, you'll realise you won't have to look far before finding someone else dealing with the same things - and what a relief that can be. Please take care of yourselves and if anyone wants to use writing as a therapeutic resource or speak about their own experiences - you can submit your writing/poetry/stories/tips/fitness/wellbeing pieces to us at hello@mentalmovement.co.uk
IKOS
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Re: Before someone you loves dies 2017/07/03 14:28:33 (permalink) ☄ Helpfulby Ankle 2017/07/04 12:40:28
Big up Drum and Bass Arena. Much love to all those struggling. Keep fighting forward.
post edited by IKOS - 2017/07/03 14:30:29
Whiskey_Bill
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Re: Before someone you loves dies 2017/07/08 10:15:59 (permalink)
I once knew a creative type that produced some decent D&B 2002-2007. He went on to form a synchro-rock 3 piece band that was fun to watch but was way over most people's heads. I asked him why he stopped producing d&b and he told me that it was music for depressives and that he shook a big monkey off his back when he stopped listening/producing to d&b. At the time, I thought he was full of shit, but the more I go on, I realize that he was right. The music itself is best when extremely emotional (uplifting, wondrous, angry, raw) and the build-up/breakdown patterns mirrors bipolar behaviour and seem to connect deeply with manic-depressive types. Fast percussion is quite hypnotic and many of us may be tapping into a well of emotion that we don't fully understand
 
Not pigeonholing you all, but I have dealt with depression for the last 20 years and it may be an unintended consequence of the extreme highs and lows of the music that most of us still love. Or maybe its the drugs, who knows?
 
Sad to see another soldier down, I feel that unresolved grief is a core issue for many substance abuse issues/suicidal tendencies and encourage anyone that has lost somebody close to fully explore the depths of their feels with either trusted friends or a dedicated professional. Let your at-risk friends know that you are there for them anytime you need and encourage them to seek help as many others here have commented. Group therapy is good for extroverts and CBT is more effective for introverts.
 
I also regret nothing I posted from the Hatchet RIP thread. I'm sure she was a nice lass but unrepentant addicts that leave children with no parent because of self-absorption get zero sympathy from me. I feel fortunate that I had good people around me to help me through the worst of my struggles and kept me from slicing my throat/ jumping off a bridge.
 
IKOS
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Re: Before someone you loves dies 2017/07/08 11:11:26 (permalink) ☄ Helpfulby RAYZA 2017/07/08 14:52:11
It's not the music Bill, it's you. Your friend was ill, as are you.
post edited by IKOS - 2017/07/08 11:12:41
JAWA
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Re: Before someone you loves dies 2017/07/08 11:21:36 (permalink)
IKOS
It's not the music Bill, it's you. Your friend was ill, as are you.


Truth.
Majik
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Re: Before someone you loves dies 2017/07/08 12:27:19 (permalink)
He was doing so well up until that last paragraph too


Arcadian
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Re: Before someone you loves dies 2017/07/08 12:33:12 (permalink)
an addict that is so lost in it all that they die and leave behind kids gets no sympathy from you?
you voted tory right
gutlessrhyme
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Re: Before someone you loves dies 2017/07/08 12:36:11 (permalink)
Arcadian
an addict that is so lost in it all that they die and leave behind kids gets no sympathy from you?
you voted tory right




He's a Canadian 'alt-right' pro Trump type

dotarr
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Re: Before someone you loves dies 2017/07/08 12:41:47 (permalink)
Arcadian
an addict that is so lost in it all that they die and leave behind kids gets no sympathy from you?
you voted tory right


Libertarians innit, everything's just personal choice and consequences of your own actions for them; no grasp of nuance or subjectivity.
Geordie007
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Re: Before someone you loves dies 2017/07/08 18:01:07 (permalink)
I knew this thread had to be bumped by him. It was at least 4 pages back now so he didn't just chance upon it by logging in. He knew it were there. And the result is as expected
Geordie007
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Re: Before someone you loves dies 2017/07/08 18:01:07 (permalink)
I knew this thread had to be bumped by him. It was at least 4 pages back now so he didn't just chance upon it by logging in. He knew it were there. And the result is as expected
Whiskey_Bill
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Re: Before someone you loves dies 2017/07/08 20:01:36 (permalink)
gutlessrhyme
Arcadian
an addict that is so lost in it all that they die and leave behind kids gets no sympathy from you?
you voted tory right




He's a Canadian 'alt-right' pro Trump type


 
You lefties and your labels. Suicide by addiction is still suicide. Tragic, yes, but taking the easy way out when you have little lives depending on your existence is nothing I would support. Now her child is disadvantaged and likely will be another victim of the system who doesn't have much to look forward to except abuse and drugs. I hope she chooses to rise above it all and excel.
 
All because of a stubborn and selfish mother that refused to clean up.
 
Slippery MilkLibertarians innit, everything's just personal choice and consequences of your own actions for them; no grasp of nuance or subjectivity.

 
The future is now.  Be today who you want to be tomorrow and all that. I don't get where nuance or a subjective point of view interferes with those beliefs. You can't legislate a sense of personal responsibility into people.  All you fucking Marxists refuse to embrace the strength of the individual mind and would rather intersect and stratify to rationalize sociological factors/hive mind mentality than accept that individuals are constantly redefining themselves by their actions. Only weak-minded fools seek out group identity as a substitute for a lack of their own.
 
 
GSV
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Re: Before someone you loves dies 2017/07/08 20:30:52 (permalink)
Whiskey_Bill
gutlessrhyme
Arcadian
an addict that is so lost in it all that they die and leave behind kids gets no sympathy from you?
you voted tory right




He's a Canadian 'alt-right' pro Trump type


 
You lefties and your labels. Suicide by addiction is still suicide. Tragic, yes, but taking the easy way out when you have little lives depending on your existence is nothing I would support. Now her child is disadvantaged and likely will be another victim of the system who doesn't have much to look forward to except abuse and drugs. I hope she chooses to rise above it all and excel.
 
All because of a stubborn and selfish mother that refused to clean up.
 
Slippery MilkLibertarians innit, everything's just personal choice and consequences of your own actions for them; no grasp of nuance or subjectivity.

 
The future is now.  Be today who you want to be tomorrow and all that. I don't get where nuance or a subjective point of view interferes with those beliefs. You can't legislate a sense of personal responsibility into people.  All you fucking Marxists refuse to embrace the strength of the individual mind and would rather intersect and stratify to rationalize sociological factors/hive mind mentality than accept that individuals are constantly redefining themselves by their actions. Only weak-minded fools seek out group identity as a substitute for a lack of their own.
 
 


It's a shame your friends didn't leave you to it let's be honest.
Whiskey_Bill
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Re: Before someone you loves dies 2017/07/08 20:54:01 (permalink)
It's a shame you allow words on the internet to upset you so.
Arcadian
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Re: Before someone you loves dies 2017/07/08 23:55:49 (permalink) ☄ Helpfulby RAYZA 2017/07/09 00:42:59
its a shame you allow your depression to detach you from empathy and sympathy
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