Helpful ReplyHot!Juvenile things you do to annoy your missus

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H. H. Holmes
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RE: Juvenile things you do to annoy your missus 2012/04/23 21:30:01 (permalink)

ORIGINAL: Temp0

Placing a Leek on the toilet lid before telling her we've got a big leak in the bathroom.


#31
James OD
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RE: Juvenile things you do to annoy your missus 2012/04/23 21:33:34 (permalink)
Throw cupped farts at her. She hates it. I find it hilarious.




#32
Daniel Snakeman
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RE: Juvenile things you do to annoy your missus 2012/04/23 21:34:50 (permalink)
when they complain about disgusting farts just say

"don't worry about it! its just the smell of my insides squeezed out through my anus, whats not to like about that!"
#33
Effin
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RE: Juvenile things you do to annoy your missus 2012/04/23 21:37:26 (permalink)
I look for news ways each and every day but finger in the belly button is by far the most effective.
#34
Temp0
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RE: Juvenile things you do to annoy your missus 2012/04/23 21:38:20 (permalink)
Write 'Bonbonbonbons' on her shopping list, without fail.
#35
2ndPhase
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RE: Juvenile things you do to annoy your missus 2012/04/23 21:59:24 (permalink)
Just generally being a cunt, it really annoys her.
#36
LeonBlue
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RE: Juvenile things you do to annoy your missus 2012/04/23 22:36:32 (permalink)

ORIGINAL: Jme133

ORIGINAL: Kola Nut

Punch her in the face as hard as possible.





Yeah that got me too J send me that f'n tune !
#37
krytikalmass
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RE: Juvenile things you do to annoy your missus 2012/04/23 22:44:19 (permalink)

ORIGINAL: DJ_H20

poke her bumhole.



CLASSIC


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#38
LeonBlue
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RE: Juvenile things you do to annoy your missus 2012/04/23 22:52:11 (permalink)
A few.... great thread btw a genuine lol at some of these too

When shes upstairs sometimes, ill give her a shout and say " babe pop down here a minute, quick" and when she arrives, pretend I have no idea what she is talking about

another good one is ill give her a cuddle and grab both her bum cheeks and slowly part them, and say that the more she tries to stop it with her hands the more they will part

and the occasional wind up never goes a miss, was sat in the traffic just down my road the other day and phoned her with my number witheld and told her i had been arrested, said i could only be very brief and could not tell her anythin at all yet other than that i had left a white bag with some stuff in it behind my decks and that i needed her to run it along the river and chuck it all away immediatly as the feds were heading to our house and hung up... then i silently entered via the backdoor ( not hers, the actual one ) and sat quietly on the sofa in the dark until she came downstairs and nearly shit herself when she walked into find me there... made me laugh anyway
#39
krytikalmass
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RE: Juvenile things you do to annoy your missus 2012/04/23 22:53:48 (permalink)
this thread is gold, stirling work


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#40
Nugz
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RE: Juvenile things you do to annoy your missus 2012/04/23 22:53:58 (permalink)
sing her favourite songs out of tune at the top of my voice, the closer to her the better the reaction
#41
Grade
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RE: Juvenile things you do to annoy your missus 2012/04/23 22:56:10 (permalink)

ORIGINAL: Jme133

ORIGINAL: Kola Nut

Punch her in the face as hard as possible.






#42
B.D.
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RE: Juvenile things you do to annoy your missus 2012/04/23 23:00:06 (permalink)

ORIGINAL: Grade

ORIGINAL: Jme133

ORIGINAL: Kola Nut

Punch her in the face as hard as possible.





#43
Syhr
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RE: Juvenile things you do to annoy your missus 2012/04/23 23:03:42 (permalink)
Announcing that I want a cup of tea in the morning and shoving her out of bed and onto the floor.
If one of her rants goes on too long just start singing and wander off.
Teabaggings whenever the opportunity arises.


#44
sauvage
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RE: Juvenile things you do to annoy your missus 2012/04/23 23:06:42 (permalink)
Tell her how fit her sisters/mum are and explain in detail all the filthy things id do to them.

Forget her middle name.

Go to give her a kiss but blow a raspberry in her face.

Give her a kiss but delay the kissing sound half a second after she makes it.

Make up shit she's 'said' and tell my parents/friends while she's present.
#45
Temp0
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RE: Juvenile things you do to annoy your missus 2012/04/23 23:11:13 (permalink)
Supermarket ones are always good.

Throw a ball at her, she catches it, 'throw it back then' she throws it and you just move out of the way 'WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING!'' as the ball bounces down the aisle
#46
Noc
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RE: Juvenile things you do to annoy your missus 2012/04/23 23:11:33 (permalink)
Referring to her northern accent as a 'speech impediment' without fail, and pointing out how 'boat' and 'bought' are in fact, two very different words.

Reminding her at every available opportunity how many of her favourite things I introduced her to and she would never have experienced without me: coffee, olives, The Wire etc.
#47
IKOS
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RE: Juvenile things you do to annoy your missus 2012/04/23 23:19:44 (permalink)
Licking her face. Not in a sensual way. Like a dog would
#48
Gravity The Don
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RE: Juvenile things you do to annoy your missus 2012/04/23 23:22:09 (permalink)

ORIGINAL: Kola Nut

Punch her in the face as hard as possible.


Hahaha, classic
#49
Armitage Shanks
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RE: Juvenile things you do to annoy your missus 2012/04/23 23:22:38 (permalink)
Good thread, I used to like telling mine I was going to be round for dinner then just sitting in the pub and getting smashed watching football, then she left me.
Farting on her in bed and pretending I did it in my sleep.
Rubbing my stinky shoes / socks in her face.
Acting sexually inappropriate whenever it would annoy her, at work, in front of her sister....

Ah god, I hated that bitch.
#50
Goodone
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RE: Juvenile things you do to annoy your missus 2012/04/23 23:22:52 (permalink)


ORIGINAL: Noc

Referring to her northern accent as a 'speech impediment' without fail, and pointing out how 'boat' and 'bought' are in fact, two very different words.

Reminding her at every available opportunity how many of her favourite things I introduced her to and she would never have experienced without me: coffee, olives, The Wire etc.

lol are you sure?
#51
LeonBlue
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RE: Juvenile things you do to annoy your missus 2012/04/23 23:24:39 (permalink)

ORIGINAL: Temp0

Supermarket ones are always good.

Throw a ball at her, she catches it, 'throw it back then' she throws it and you just move out of the way 'WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING!'' as the ball bounces down the aisle



Yeah u know, just reminded me of a fave actually

when you are in ear shot of other shoppers, say loud enough for their ears things like " when u get home im going to give u a kickin like never before " or " dont make me batter you again " etc
#52
silentjob
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RE: Juvenile things you do to annoy your missus 2012/04/23 23:25:57 (permalink)
^ I do this. She loves it lol.
#53
Noc
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RE: Juvenile things you do to annoy your missus 2012/04/23 23:26:02 (permalink)

ORIGINAL: Goodone

ORIGINAL: Noc

Referring to her northern accent as a 'speech impediment' without fail, and pointing out how 'boat' and 'bought' are in fact, two very different words.

Reminding her at every available opportunity how many of her favourite things I introduced her to and she would never have experienced without me: coffee, olives, The Wire etc.

lol are you sure?


Yes. She hated both before I came along and forced her to broaden her horizons and appreciate the finer things in life.
#54
Goodone
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RE: Juvenile things you do to annoy your missus 2012/04/23 23:29:18 (permalink)


ORIGINAL: Noc

ORIGINAL: Goodone

ORIGINAL: Noc

Referring to her northern accent as a 'speech impediment' without fail, and pointing out how 'boat' and 'bought' are in fact, two very different words.

Reminding her at every available opportunity how many of her favourite things I introduced her to and she would never have experienced without me: coffee, olives, The Wire etc.

lol are you sure?


Yes. She hated both before I came along and forced her to broaden her horizons and appreciate the finer things in life.

It's just when I read it I was expecting you to have introduced her to something really exotic etc was a bit of an anticlimax lol

But yes, olives are live!
#55
BrockLessChompster
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RE: Juvenile things you do to annoy your missus 2012/04/23 23:31:44 (permalink)
genuine lol leonblue, some good poasts
#56
ChunkyMunky
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RE: Juvenile things you do to annoy your missus 2012/04/23 23:35:45 (permalink)

ORIGINAL: LeonBlue

ORIGINAL: Temp0

Supermarket ones are always good.

Throw a ball at her, she catches it, 'throw it back then' she throws it and you just move out of the way 'WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING!'' as the ball bounces down the aisle



Yeah u know, just reminded me of a fave actually

when you are in ear shot of other shoppers, say loud enough for their ears things like " when u get home im going to give u a kickin like never before " or " dont make me batter you again " etc


Fucking lol
#57
dacks
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RE: Juvenile things you do to annoy your missus 2012/04/23 23:36:14 (permalink)
tickle her top lip when shes trying to sleep at night/the morning. hilarious


#58
LeonBlue
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RE: Juvenile things you do to annoy your missus 2012/04/23 23:36:52 (permalink)

ORIGINAL: BrockLessChompster

genuine lol leonblue, some good poasts



i do terrorise her to be fair, but shes a good girl and aint scared
#59
Willfunk
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RE: Juvenile things you do to annoy your missus 2012/04/23 23:42:58 (permalink)

ORIGINAL: LeonBlue

ORIGINAL: Temp0

Supermarket ones are always good.

Throw a ball at her, she catches it, 'throw it back then' she throws it and you just move out of the way 'WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING!'' as the ball bounces down the aisle



when you are in ear shot of other shoppers, say loud enough for their ears things like " when u get home im going to give u a kickin like never before " or " dont make me batter you again " etc


Hahaha I do this all the time. Also ill grab her arm and pretend to pull her down the isle in Tescos saying "COME ON! WERE GOING! YOU'VE EMBARRASED ME FOR THE LAST TIME!" She thinks its hilarious though.

I ring up her work pretending to be a potential client/buyer and see how long I can wind her up for by being rude and making unreasonable requests or until she realises its me and tells me to fuck off.

I ring her up at least twice a day

#60
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