Helpful ReplyHot!Juvenile things you do to annoy your missus

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Split Concept
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Re: RE: Juvenile things you do to annoy your missus 2017/12/22 11:57:15 (permalink)
Farting and combining it with a huge pelvic thrust while in the spoon position.
post edited by Split Concept - 2017/12/22 11:58:32


Willfunk
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Re: RE: Juvenile things you do to annoy your missus 2017/12/22 13:01:27 (permalink)
Split Concept
Farting and combining it with a huge pelvic thrust while in the spoon position.


LOL. Nice
chris blu mar ten
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Re: RE: Juvenile things you do to annoy your missus 2017/12/22 15:04:22 (permalink)
Jimmy2Shoes
One I used to use was casting a picture of my smug looking face onto the TV while she is watching a programme she likes while I'm in another room.
 
It started off just a few seconds at a time then I would just leave it up there until she would go nuts. Got a video of doing it somewhere I'll have to find.


lol


Rudeboysy
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Re: RE: Juvenile things you do to annoy your missus 2017/12/22 16:39:20 (permalink)
Asking her to tell me about her day and then within 5 seconds of her starting shouting “BORING” in a posh voice right at her
Whagwan
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Re: RE: Juvenile things you do to annoy your missus 2017/12/25 01:20:14 (permalink)
Making up really shit names for our upcoming child and then pushing her for an opinion as if I'm serious...
Goodone
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Re: RE: Juvenile things you do to annoy your missus 2017/12/25 08:13:59 (permalink)
Lenin? Trotsky? Chairman mao?
Whagwan
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Re: RE: Juvenile things you do to annoy your missus 2017/12/25 12:02:17 (permalink) ☄ Helpfulby Lrrr 2017/12/25 12:34:07
Hilarity ensued.
SmokedEggs
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Re: RE: Juvenile things you do to annoy your missus 2017/12/25 12:11:51 (permalink)
I had a friend at school called Doug and his Mom was always the butt of jokes.

I haven't spoken to Doug for about 12 years but when speaking to my Mrs, Doug's Mom is my stock response to many questions, or referent point for describing things, and the more nonsensical and abstract the better e.g.

"The bathroom floor is wetter than Doug's Mom."

"These terms and conditions are tighter than Doug's Mom"

Putting "Doug's Mom" into the lyrics of songs playing on the radio is another favourite. This morning I serenaded her with "don't let Doug's Mom go down on me".

Sometimes finds it funny but mostly finds it juvenile and irritating.
Oversight
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Re: RE: Juvenile things you do to annoy your missus 2017/12/25 12:25:49 (permalink)
😂 doug’s mum
JUDGEDREDD
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Re: RE: Juvenile things you do to annoy your missus 2017/12/26 16:44:45 (permalink)
Send her pictures of my nipple on whatsapp, it's slowly going to ruin the relationship 
Test Recordings
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Re: RE: Juvenile things you do to annoy your missus 2017/12/27 06:59:33 (permalink)
I say random shit like Japanese bread is demon food and other nonsense.
I'm a cat, feed me my cat food please. (often said just before starting dinner)
If you don't do (whatever it is) a demon will jump out of hell and take you back with it.
Pew pew pew! (answer to "What are you doing today?")
Tomorrow (answer to her sister who asked when the train we're waiting for was coming)
I'm dancing all day (another answer to "What are you doing today?")
Etc
 
I do this to my uni students too sometimes just to see if they're actually paying attention to what I'm saying. Japanese people don't fuck around like Brits do and can be so fucking boringly serious that I love throwing a spanner in the mind to see what happens...
M.F.
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Re: RE: Juvenile things you do to annoy your missus 2017/12/27 07:44:44 (permalink)
My girlfriend asked me tonight what kind of wild animals we have in London. I responded with “Bears, wolves, Jaguars, snakes, giant man eating foxes, flesh eating hedghogs, and alligators & sharks that swim in the Thames river” and she believed every single word of it. Serious downy vibes. Jesus


MalcolmTucker
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Re: RE: Juvenile things you do to annoy your missus 2017/12/27 10:53:15 (permalink)
SmokedEggs
I had a friend at school called Doug and his Mom was always the butt of jokes.

I haven't spoken to Doug for about 12 years but when speaking to my Mrs, Doug's Mom is my stock response to many questions, or referent point for describing things, and the more nonsensical and abstract the better e.g.

"The bathroom floor is wetter than Doug's Mom."

"These terms and conditions are tighter than Doug's Mom"

Putting "Doug's Mom" into the lyrics of songs playing on the radio is another favourite. This morning I serenaded her with "don't let Doug's Mom go down on me".

Sometimes finds it funny but mostly finds it juvenile and irritating.



Are you American? Why do you keep saying mom?
SmokedEggs
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Re: RE: Juvenile things you do to annoy your missus 2017/12/27 11:06:14 (permalink)
MalcolmTucker
SmokedEggs
I had a friend at school called Doug and his Mom was always the butt of jokes.

I haven't spoken to Doug for about 12 years but when speaking to my Mrs, Doug's Mom is my stock response to many questions, or referent point for describing things, and the more nonsensical and abstract the better e.g.

"The bathroom floor is wetter than Doug's Mom."

"These terms and conditions are tighter than Doug's Mom"

Putting "Doug's Mom" into the lyrics of songs playing on the radio is another favourite. This morning I serenaded her with "don't let Doug's Mom go down on me".

Sometimes finds it funny but mostly finds it juvenile and irritating.



Are you American? Why do you keep saying mom?


No. I'm from the Black Country, where Mom is said instead of Mum. Are you a Southerner?
H. H. Holmes
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Re: RE: Juvenile things you do to annoy your missus 2017/12/27 11:24:54 (permalink) ☄ Helpfulby Whagwan 2017/12/27 12:59:20
MF182
My girlfriend asked me tonight what kind of wild animals we have in London. I responded with “Bears, wolves, Jaguars, snakes, giant man eating foxes, flesh eating hedghogs, and alligators & sharks that swim in the Thames river” and she believed every single word of it. Serious downy vibes. Jesus


Love always finds a way
MalcolmTucker
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Re: RE: Juvenile things you do to annoy your missus 2017/12/27 12:38:24 (permalink)
SmokedEggs
MalcolmTucker
SmokedEggs
I had a friend at school called Doug and his Mom was always the butt of jokes.

I haven't spoken to Doug for about 12 years but when speaking to my Mrs, Doug's Mom is my stock response to many questions, or referent point for describing things, and the more nonsensical and abstract the better e.g.

"The bathroom floor is wetter than Doug's Mom."

"These terms and conditions are tighter than Doug's Mom"

Putting "Doug's Mom" into the lyrics of songs playing on the radio is another favourite. This morning I serenaded her with "don't let Doug's Mom go down on me".

Sometimes finds it funny but mostly finds it juvenile and irritating.



Are you American? Why do you keep saying mom?


No. I'm from the Black Country, where Mom is said instead of Mum. Are you a Southerner?



Yeah. I had no idea mom was used in the UK.
Whagwan
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Re: RE: Juvenile things you do to annoy your missus 2017/12/27 12:59:54 (permalink)
MalcolmTucker



Yeah. I had no idea mom was used in the UK.




Just say mum in a Midlands accent
MellowHype
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Re: RE: Juvenile things you do to annoy your missus 2017/12/27 13:16:22 (permalink)
Keep saying "that's true, what question should I ask you? " after everything she says.

From an MF Doom track I think
H. H. Holmes
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Re: RE: Juvenile things you do to annoy your missus 2017/12/27 19:55:17 (permalink)
IT'S JUST A TING

In response to virtually anything. One of the forums finer moments.
JUDGEDREDD
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Re: RE: Juvenile things you do to annoy your missus 2017/12/28 00:06:15 (permalink)
Jump scares are being introduced, always a laugh
RAYZA
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Re: RE: Juvenile things you do to annoy your missus 2017/12/28 00:16:17 (permalink)
Whagwan
MalcolmTucker



Yeah. I had no idea mom was used in the UK.




Just say mum in a Midlands accent


I don't think that's how language works m8
Test Recordings
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Re: RE: Juvenile things you do to annoy your missus 2017/12/31 10:00:03 (permalink)
I heard mom's a thing round there too
 
Don't forget people say mam too, inclusive vowel use yo
Oversight
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Re: RE: Juvenile things you do to annoy your missus 2017/12/31 10:54:14 (permalink)
Shouting “SHARKNADO” and throwing a shark teddy at her face

Doing Big Shaq bars at her

Trying to put my thumb up her bum whenever she walks past
Syzlack_24
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Re: RE: Juvenile things you do to annoy your missus 2017/12/31 13:41:51 (permalink) ☄ Helpfulby dazdsb 2018/01/03 19:19:03
Nick S

The 'You're a....' rebuttal to everything:
"Have you seen that photo album anywhere?"
"You're a photo album"
"Where's the top for the blender?"
"You're a top for the blender" etc




This is a big part of my life.
Rudiger01
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Re: RE: Juvenile things you do to annoy your missus 2018/01/03 19:18:11 (permalink)
When she brings in food or drink and goes back to the kitchen for something else, I devour as much of it as possible. She loves that one
21 21
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Re: RE: Juvenile things you do to annoy your missus 2018/01/03 19:19:26 (permalink)
Syzlack_23
Nick S

The 'You're a....' rebuttal to everything:
"Have you seen that photo album anywhere?"
"You're a photo album"
"Where's the top for the blender?"
"You're a top for the blender" etc




This is a big part of my life.





same lol
 
it's so lazy but it's massively effective. 
Fiend.
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Re: RE: Juvenile things you do to annoy your missus 2018/01/03 22:41:39 (permalink)
Or "Your face is a ....."
 
Sometimes simplicity is the best.
 
Also cupping a fart in a loosely clenched fist and "blowdarting" it into her face. Making sure to blow out not suck in.

...is this what you want???
Hammered
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Re: RE: Juvenile things you do to annoy your missus 2018/05/15 10:41:03 (permalink)
When the missus answers a question I have recently taken to repeating the answer followed by "may god have mercy on us all" ala this:

Bertie Bassett
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Re: RE: Juvenile things you do to annoy your missus 2018/05/15 10:48:04 (permalink)
Test Recordings
I say random shit like Japanese bread is demon food and other nonsense.
I'm a cat, feed me my cat food please. (often said just before starting dinner)
If you don't do (whatever it is) a demon will jump out of hell and take you back with it.
Pew pew pew! (answer to "What are you doing today?")
Tomorrow (answer to her sister who asked when the train we're waiting for was coming)
I'm dancing all day (another answer to "What are you doing today?")
Etc




Daniel Snakeman
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Re: RE: Juvenile things you do to annoy your missus 2018/05/15 10:50:45 (permalink)
dazdsb
Syzlack_23
Nick S

The 'You're a....' rebuttal to everything:
"Have you seen that photo album anywhere?"
"You're a photo album"
"Where's the top for the blender?"
"You're a top for the blender" etc




This is a big part of my life.





same lol
 
it's so lazy but it's massively effective. 




 
This is all well and good until your kids start doing it to you
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